I was exhausted during a trip back from Mayo, having been away from home and my ailing mother for just over 27 hours, so I stopped at my brother’s for a quick nap.  Upon waking, these little lovelies implored  me to stay a little longer to play, I politely bowed out stating, “I need to get back to Pella–Grandma’s veerrry sick,” I said slowly, simplistically, hoping they would understand the need for my hasty my departure.

“Aunt Lisa,” one of them gently said, “She’s not sick–she’s going to die.” She had a slightly perplexed look of concern in her eyes that no one had told me of Grandma’s prognosis. “It’s going to be okay,” she quickly explained, “Because she’s going to heaven–but her body will still be here–her soul’s going to heaven.”  

The simple explanation of acceptance from my niece unnerved me.  I turned to my sister-in-law and quietly said, “I need to have someone with me–it’s only an hour drive, but I can’t be alone with my thoughts. Is there someone who can go with me?”  One of the older girls was chosen…one who could be fairly independent.

Later, at the Comfort House, we were relaxing with Mom reclining in her chair and my niece lounging on the bed, I stated, “Mom, one of the things that I’m going to miss is your encouraging comments on my blog.” I paused, not knowing her reaction, “After you die, would it be okay if I hack into your email account and pretend I am you and write nice comments about what I wrote?”

“Sure,” was Mom’s nonchalant response.

With a curl of her lips and a questioning brow, my niece wasn’t afraid to give her input, “That’s weird.” 
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I miss my mom’s encouragement, not only in what I’ve written, but in everyday life. Even though she never owned pom-poms, she had the smile and enthusiasm of an incredible cheerleader. Stay tuned to see if there are comments posthumously.